Glamour Shots
by ThroughTheLensAnonymousContest
Summary: Bella is a lonely kindergarten teacher looking for love.  Edward is a quirky photographer just trying to stay afloat.  What will happen when Bella wants to get pictures taken and put them on an internet dating site?


**Through The Lens One-Shot Contest**  
**Story Title: Glamour Shots**  
**Summary: Bella is a lonely kindergarten teacher looking for love. Edward is a quirky photographer just trying to stay afloat. What will happen when Bella wants to get pictures taken and put them on an internet dating site? Will she find true love or will it slip through her fingers again?**  
**Characters: Bella x Edward**  
**Disclaimer: Not really**

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It was a Thursday morning, like all Thursday mornings that had come before. Edward shrugged on his brown plaid wool jacket. He checked his reflection in the mirror which hung in the entryway to his modest condo. As he looked at himself, he noted his eyebrows seemed large and bushy, while his hair was reminiscent of something from the tall, drug addled character from Scooby Doo. He thought of himself as utterly plain and unappealing. His shaggy brown hair was nothing special and his skin seemed pale and peaked. He shrugged his shoulders with one last glance at his reflection, thankful his job was located behind the lens and not in front of it.

Edward walked to the elaborate cage located in his dining room in place of a dining table. He bid farewell to his only friends, Henri and Dorthea, his pet rats named for his favorite photographers (Henri Cartier-Bresson and Dorthea Lange).

As he drove to work in his beat up 81' model VW Rabbit, Edward thought about how his life had come to pass. At twenty-five, he felt utterly unaccomplished for he was a photographer at Glamour Shots. His mother and father had wanted him to become a surgeon, but Edward just wanted to take pictures, and surgeons didn't take pictures.

No one had told Edward how difficult it was going to be to make an actual living being the artist behind the camera. So he was forced into corporate malign, and took a job at the mall photographing teenagers for their graduation photos, and brides for their weddings.

Day after day, Edward took snapshots of girls and women (and the occasional man), coaxing out their beautiful smiles. But he knew their smiles were never for him. They were for someone else. Their portraits would be for friends and loved ones; smiles to be given away.

Edward longed for someone to give _him_ a smile.

ʘ‿ʘ

Across town, Bella stood at the front of her class pointing to the letters on the blackboard. It was just another day in the dreary, monotonous life of a kindergarten teacher. Each day she would get up at dawn, start her ancient coffee maker, take a shower, and peddle her '82 Schwinn in Fair Lady pink, three miles to Oak Ridge Montessori School. There she mindlessly taught small children who were challenged in keeping bodily fluids to themselves, to read and write. It was the same routine she'd followed for two years straight.

This had not been Bella's original career choice. She had dreamt of becoming a writer, traveling the world seeking new and exciting places while scouring the globe for ideas that lead to her next masterpiece. She wanted to be caught up in romance and swept off her feet where passion would reign, and two lovers would stay up all night lost in each other's blissful embrace. But that hadn't been in the cards for Bella. Instead, she daydreamed about the endless, faraway possibilities she thought would never be.

At the end of her impossibly long day, Bella reluctantly hopped on her bike and sped back to her small one bedroom apartment; all without noticing the gum in her hair. When she walked inside and threw her bags on the table she greeted her oversized black and white tabby cat, Killer. He nuzzled her hand and purred in contentment while she scratched between his ears. As Bella stood up and threw a fake mouse for Killer to chase, she glanced at the mirror through the bathroom door and shrieked in terror. She'd finally noticed the gum and felt tears well up in her dark eyes.

Her beauty never concerned her until recently. After she realized her life was empty, she fruitlessly sought the companionship of men. Unfortunately, most of the men she met were losers by definition. Bella went on many first dates but rarely a second.

As she stared at her reflection, her most embarrassing dates came flooding back to her. There was the man who lived with his mother and had a collection of Disney villain shirts, the unemployed actor who spent all his free time in Civil War re-enactments, the tool who talked and acted like he was from the Jersey shore when he was really born and raised in New Mexico, and the guy who wore themed cowboy boots with each of his outfits, mainly consisting of polyester track suits. The list seemed never ending. Bella wondered what she'd done to piss off her friends and cause them to set her up with such losers, but resigned herself into simply believing she was a loser too.

Despite her own apathy for her reflection, Bella was a beautiful woman. But she felt as though no one would ever want her. As she stood in front of her bathroom mirror crying and hopelessly trying to remove the gum from her hair, Bella stopped and stared. What she perceived of herself was really rather shocking to an outsider. She claimed she saw blank, brown eyes which were now puffy and red from sobbing, and her cheeks and neck were red and blotchy. Bella also hated her long hair, for there was nothing she could do to tame the wild frizz. As she chewed on her bottom lip, a nervous habit, she swore it would be less lopsided if she'd never done it at all.

However, the outside world saw Bella as a classic beauty with thick flowing hair, sparkling brown eyes, round rosy cheeks, and luscious plump lips. She was truly something to behold, but she just hadn't met her match in the universe yet.

Feeling defeated, Bella walked to her small living room and plopped down on her ratty couch. She sighed and called her best friend for gum removal advice.

"Alice Whitlock, Personal Shopper and Avon Beauty Consultant. How may I be of assistance?"

"Hey, Ali. It's Bella. I need some help."

"Oh hey! I was just thinking about you, sweetie. How was your day? I'm guessing not so good since you need my help. What happened? Did that Eric kid spill Kool-aid all over your white Keds again, 'cus I'll kick his little…"

"No, Ali. Eric didn't ruin another pair of shoes." Bella huffed and repositioned herself so she was now laying on the couch with her feet hanging over the arm rest.

"Oh no! Don't tell me he wrote in permanent marker on your Vera Bradley bag!" Alice squeaked and held her breath.

"No, not that either. No clothing or accessories were harmed in the line of duty today. Ali… I got gum in my hair. I need to know how to get it out."

"Oh, Bella, that's awful. I'm so sorry." Alice could hear Bella sniffling through the phone and knew she was crying. Alice felt terrible for Bella and wanted to do something that would make her mood turn completely around.

"Okay Bella. Don't even think about using peanut butter. I have a better idea."

Bella groaned internally because she knew Alice's _better idea_ would include getting out of the house and spending more money than necessary.

Alice, being the devoted friend she was, jumped in her car and started driving to the apartment before Bella had time to argue. She divulged her plans for Bella to get the "full treatment" tonight at her favorite salon.

"Oh no you don't, Alice. The last time I got the 'full treatment' I ended up with a wicked rash on my hoo-ha from the wax, and neon green nail polish. I don't think that's a good idea. It's more like torture than a treat."

"I will be there soon, so you better be ready or I'm dragging you out of the house wearing only your unmentionables."

Bella flinched at Alice's words, because she knew the threat was true. During their senior year of college Alice was trying to help Bella get over a terrible break up and pulled her out of her dorm room wearing only her bra and panties.

When Alice finally arrived, they drove across town to _Rock Paper Scissors, _a hair salon that had been quit trendy in its day, and met with Alice's stylist, Michael. He swore Bella would be primped and polished when he was finished.

After four painfully long hours, Bella was waxed, buffed, polished, and gum free. She'd never felt so exhausted in her entire life. Despite her reluctance for all things girlie, she found the evening rather enjoyable. Alice beamed as she watched her friend begin what she hoped would be an amazing life transformation.

"Thank you, Alice. I think I really needed that." Bella blushed as they walked out of salon and got back into Alice's yellow Ford Fiero.

"Bella, you know I'd do anything for you, right?"

Sirens blared in Bella's head at Alice's statement. The last time she said that, Bella wound up half naked, completely wasted and knee deep in cow manure.

"Don't worry about anything," Alice squealed. "I have a very good feeling about things this time. I know something amazing will happen."

Bella wanted to ask _what things_ Alice was speaking of, but she was too afraid to ask. Instead, she let the comment pass without question. As Alice drove toward Bella's apartment, she smiled wistfully, while Bella cringed at the thought of how much her life was going to be turned upside down by whatever plan her friend had concocted.

The pair arrived twenty minutes later with their favorite take-out in hand from Panda Express. As they sat down on the couch to eat, Alice wasted no time in revealing her grand scheme; most of it, anyway.

"Okay, so here's the deal. Since you're all beautified and sexied up, I thought you could go and get your picture taken." Bella's face showed her distaste for the idea. "Now before you get all whiney on me, I know you hate pictures of yourself but I promise this will work."

Pictures of Bella never turned out well. It was as though a Bella Gremlin jumped in front of the camera lens at the last second.

"Alice, you keep saying 'this will work,' but you realize I have no idea what you're talking about, right?" Bella complained.

"Alright; after you get your picture taken, you're going to post it on an Internet dating site, _Plenty of Fish dot com_."

Bella's face scrunched up in disgust at the mention of posting her picture on the internet and soliciting strangers for dates. She had enough trouble agreeing to have photos taken in the first place and to actually have strangers see them was unsettling.

"Don't make that face at me young lady," Alice wagged her tiny glitter painted finger in Bella's face. "You're twenty-four years old. Don't you think it's about time you finally found someone and settled down?"

"I never in a million years thought I would be as lucky as you and Jasper. You two just seemed to click and mesh so effortlessly. Why do you always think I need that too? I'm okay on my own. Besides even if I did meet someone, who's to say they won't turn out to be a total creepoid like the last guy I dated?"

"Because, sweetie, I know this time will work. You have to have faith in me. Please?" Alice begged, pouted her lips, and batted her long lashes.

"Oh, all right, Alice. But just remember that if I end up heartbroken, you'll have to pick up the pieces again, and you know what a mess I turn into when I'm depressed."

"Yay! This will be so fun, Bella. You won't regret it. I've already made the appointment for the photo shoot and everything."

ʘ‿ʘ

Bella had awoken that Saturday morning feeling refreshed and ready for a new day. After grabbing a quick cup of coffee and a muffin from the counter she raced out her door, hopping in Alice's car before it sped away toward the mall for Bella's pre-photo shopping.

Alice had planned out Bella's entire outfit for the shoot and wanted to make sure all the pieces fell into place easily, so they arrived at the mall earlier than necessary for her appointment. They had exactly two hours for Alice to transform Bella into a goddess before the appointment at 1:30.

Bella thought shopping with Alice was a nightmare. Not only was she demanding and persistent, but she scared Bella when she was "in the zone." Alice dragged Bella from store to store looking for the clothing and accessories to complete her ensemble. By noon they had been to almost every store including _Claire's, Rave_, and_ Dress Barn_. Soon, Bella was donning all the necessities for her perfect picture.

"Alice, I think I need to eat something," Bella whimpered, feeling shaky and ill from low blood sugar. Her body wasn't used to chasing Alice around without adequate nutrition. "Are we finished shopping yet?"

"Yes, I think we are," Alice replied with a satisfied gleam in her eyes. "I'm glad the store clerks let you wear all the clothes out of the store. That saved us a lot of time."

Just then, Alice's cell phone buzzed in her purse. Jasper was calling and he needed her to come home right away for a fabric emergency. He owned a lucrative tailoring business and needed Alice to pick up some satin and lace immediately or the client was threatening to leave. Alice apologized for having to bow out from lunch, but Bella was ever the forgiving friend and assured her it was not a big deal.

ʘ‿ʘ

"Smile for the camera Miss."

Edward sighed as the young woman in front of him blazed the camera with her best smile.

"These are for my engagement announcements," the red-head chattered. But Edward wasn't really interested in _what _the photos were for. He was there to do his job and nothing more. He took great care in never-minding his clients.

"I think we're all done here. Your proofs will be ready to take with you today and you can order the photos of your choosing from our website located at the bottom of your proofs. Thanks for trusting us with your memories. Have a great day." Edward's voice was colorless. He'd said the line so many times he didn't even need to think about it to repeat it.

"When is my next appointment Jessica?" Edward grimaced as he made eye contact with the girl in front of him. He wished corporate would hire a receptionist who didn't own a Sidekick or didn't chew gum with her mouth open...or so loudly.

Jessica looked up at Edward, annoyed he'd interrupted her Facebook update. She rolled her eyes rather dramatically and sighed telling him his next appointment was at two o'clock, "_or something._"

Edward grumbled to himself, mentioning teenagers being useless. He glanced at his watch and noticed it was only noon.

_Only half-way through my day,_ Edward thought. He couldn't wait for the day to be over. "I'm going to lunch Jessica." The only reply he heard was the loud snap of Juicy-Fruit Gum.

As he wandered about the mall, relieved he had an extended lunch hour, his eyes fell upon the window display of his favorite merchant. He paused briefly in front of the window gazing at the display, but his hesitation wasn't long. He continued on to the food court wistfully thinking of the items from the store he longed to buy for someone.

As he leisurely finished his barely edible Philly Cheese Steak Stromboli from Sbarro, Edward heard a commotion near the ordering counter. He noticed a woman, huddled on the floor cursing about her fallen lunch tray. He witnessed several spectators giggle and point, but never stopping to help.

Deciding he'd eaten all of the Stromboli he could stomach and that chivalry was in fact, not dead, Edward strode over to the damsel in distress.

"Let me help you with that," he offered.

"No thanks, I got it," the woman replied without even looking up. There was a slight part in the brown curtain of hair and Edward caught a glimpse of what he considered to be a lovely young woman. Her petite features and pale skin were simply enchanting. But before he had a chance to offer any further assistance, the coffee haired beauty had run toward the restrooms.

Edward gave his signature shrug then strode the same path of his entry, back to his place of employment. As he passed by his favorite store a second time, he glanced at his watch noting he still had ample time to return before his next appointment.

Edward spied a bench on the opposite side of the walkway of his favorite store and decided to do a bit of _gazing_ before returning to work. He noted the mannequin in the window donned a lovely lace bra and panty set. He began to imagine the mannequin springing to life and rushing across the mall to leap into his arms. Only his real life mannequin would have flowing brown hair and dark eyes.

ʘ‿ʘ

After Alice's hasty departure, Bella opted for lunch in the food court. She decided on A&W as she'd not had a root beer float in ages and their meaty franks were her favorite. She patiently waited in line for what seemed like forever, but the longer she waited the more light-headed and unsteady she felt. Finally she ordered her food, and it wasn't a minute too soon.

Bella lingered for another long stretch of time while her food was made. She patiently observed what she considered to be dumbass teenage kids preparing her food. With an eye roll, Bella thought, _No wonder it's taking so long_. When she eventually got her tray, she thanked the worker and turned to look for a table.

Unfortunately, luck expired for Bella and her low blood sugar finally got the best of her. As she picked up her tray and spun around, Bella stumbled as a dizzy haze filled her head. She recovered quickly but braced herself awkwardly as she outstretched her leg to balance herself.

As Bella straightened herself out, she caught sight of the most gorgeous man sitting across the court licking his long fingers as he ate his lunch. She couldn't help but stare as she walked toward the tables. Then, before Bella knew what was happening, she bumped into a trash can and her tray was being hurled into the air.

Dishes and utensils clattered to the floor sending food flying in every direction, including her new outfit she'd just picked out. As her fellow diners snickered and stared, she slowly looked down at the food disaster. She immediately felt tears well up in her eyes and her cheeks grew warm with blush. Her outfit was completely ruined and she didn't have time to replace any of the items before her appointment.

As she bent down to clean up her mess, Bella couldn't help but think how pathetic she must have looked to everyone else; completely disheveled with food smeared all over the front of her clothing.

Then she heard a kind, male voice offer to help her. She didn't want to look up and see the pity on his face, so she ran for the nearest bathroom and attempted to clean up some of the food before her photo shoot.

ʘ‿ʘ

Sitting behind the front desk texting her latest crush, Jessica heard the loud pong from the door that signaled a customer's arrival. She lazily looked up and chuckled to herself as she watched the 1:30 appointment walk through the door. _Whoa, that's just sad. What a lame excuse for a human_, Jessica thought.

After signing Bella in, she gave her a packet of information to go through and a clipboard to fill out. When all the necessary information was provided, Bella asked Jessica if there was some place she would be able to change prior to the shoot. Jessica scoffed as she looked Bella up and down with a disgusted look, but escorted her to one of the make-up rooms and told her the stylist would be with her shortly.

"Sweetie!" A faux feminine voice caught Bella's attention and she looked into the mirror to see her exuberant stylist. He was dressed in a leopard print sweater, that was two sizes too small, and enough jewelry to outfit an entire runway of models. His hair was something reminiscent of the Rick Astley coif except on steroids; it was very large.

"You are precious!" he said as he walked closer to her chair and placed just his fingertips on her shoulders. "I'm Jake, and I'll be doing your hair and make-up today."

The thought brought chills to Bella. While she didn't know much about fashion, hair, or make-up, she knew this man was completely out of style, even for a drag queen.

"Let's make you beautiful!"

_Not likely, _Bella thought. She sighed and reluctantly leaned back in her chair allowing Jake to take over.

After a short time, Jake managed to paint on a face that Bella didn't even recognize. He used simple and understated colors that he knew brought out her subtle beauty. As Bella looked at her reflection she couldn't help but think she actually might end up looking decent in these pictures, until she looked at her hair. Any and all hope of appearing half-way decent had gone out the window. The expression "taking it to new heights" flashed in Bella's mind as she regarded her hair style.

"All right then, gorgeous!" Jake interrupted Bella's ogling. "You look marvelous if I do say so myself. Now, let's get you out of those hideous clothes so we can finish your makeover."

Jake pulled Bella out of the chair and whisked her into the studio. Bella didn't even have a chance to argue that she hated her hair and wanted it changed. She was beginning to feel like a guinea pig in an experiment that was going terribly awry.

Bella was throwing mental daggers at Jake for his rendition of _Hair Spray_ currently residing on her head, but she resigned herself into staying quiet and bottled up her aggression for another day. As Bella looked around the studio at all the outfits and wraps at her disposal, she couldn't help but reflect on what she'd gotten herself into.

Trying to channel all the Alice mojo she could muster, Bella finally settled on a floral print wrap and plain black leggings. Jake assured her it was a wonderful choice and left her to change on her own. Bella was so furiously fuming internally at her misfortune that she hadn't noticed Jake leaving the studio door slightly ajar.

ʘ‿ʘ

The scowl on Jessica's face told Edward he was in trouble as we walked back into the studio.

"Where have you been _Edward_?" Jessica sneered before popping her gum.

"At lunch _Jessica_," Edward responded in an equally snide manner.

Hoping their conversation was over, Edward began to walk away. "Thank goodness I was here to greet your 1:30 appointment," Jessica called after him.

Edward cursed himself, realizing he should have never relied on Jessica for accurate information. He made his way to the back of the studio to meet the client since he failed to appear for introductions when she arrived. Little did he know he was about to get the surprise of the century.

"EEEEEEEEKKKKKKK"

Edward stood dumbfounded, starring at the woman in front of him. She was naked from the waist up.

_Why is she naked?_ Edward wondered. At hearing the scream, Jessica came leisurely strolling to the back where she spied a very surprised Edward and a very humiliated client.

"Oops, sorry, I forgot to tell you she was back here changing. Mustard or something…" Jessica said as her voice drifted off and her attention went back to the phone in her hands.

Edward was unabashedly starring at the young woman in front of him. He instantly recognized her from the food court. He would know that brown hair and pale skin anywhere.

"Get out!" She shouted. Edward abruptly turned around and walked back to the photography area stunned into silence. He had just met the girl of his dreams and the Gods sent her here naked! Suddenly, Edward realized this was the best day ever.

"Jessica, the client in back… is she here for a wedding shoot?"

"Uh… not likely." Jessica's tone indicated she didn't believe male companionship was an option for the lovely woman standing naked in the back of Edward's studio.

Edward was embarrassed. Aroused, but embarrassed. He sat in his captains' chair thinking of ways to ease the tension. He had, after all, just seen his client naked.

After only a few moments, the lovely woman appeared in front of him. She stared at the ground, afraid to look into her voyeur's eyes. Edward thought it best to ease the tension the old fashioned way.

"Hi, um…I'm Edward. Welcome to Glamour Shots." His hand shot out in an attempt to shake the young woman's hand, but the gesture went unreturned. Edward was determined not to give up.

"So what brings you in for photos today?" Edward held his breath hoping it wasn't for a surprise gift for a boyfriend or engagement photos, despite Jessica's commentary to the contrary.

"Bella."

Edward was a bit confused, and rightfully so.

"Excuse me?" Edward replied, hoping he could get more information.

"Sorry," came a timid reply. "My name is Bella. And the photos are for…"

She hesitated, not knowing if she was comfortable divulging the reason behind her photos. Edward could sense her discomfort and wanted desperately to take it away.

"It's okay. So what kind of poses were you thinking?"

"I'm not sure. What would you recommend?" Edward was stumped. It would be difficult to tell her the best positions without knowledge of her purpose.

"I don't mean to pry, but perhaps if you give me some idea what they are for, I can help."

Bella was already mortified by the events of the day and she didn't want to risk further exposure by admitting she was about to prostitute herself out for dates on the internet. Then again, the whole day had been a complete joke. Bella figured why stop now.

"They are for an internet dating site." Bella went on to explain to the photographer Alice's plan for a '_whole new Bella' _transformation.

While Edward was relieved that Bella wasn't getting photographs taken for a certain mister, he was dismayed that she was getting them taken for potential suitors.

Edward couldn't deny the question screaming in his head. _Why would the lovely young Bella need to turn to the internet for a date? She is wonderful_!

As Edward looked at the divine creature in front of him, a plan began to form. Edward would ask the charming Miss Bella for a date, saving her from the clutches of crazed sex fiends often found prowling the World Wide Web.

He hastily snapped photo after photo of Bella. When he finished, he scrolled through his worked, pleased with himself. He'd managed to capture her snarling, cringing, wincing or frowning in just about every photo. He happily selected Bella's worst poses and printed them off on the contact sheet, slipping them in their protective sleeve.

"Here you are. You really are a breathtaking subject to photograph." Edward said as he handed over the proofs he'd just packaged. Bella opened the portfolio just as Edward said this and immediately fought her tears.

_Bella Gremlin strikes again_. He'd said she was breathtaking, but all Bella saw was picture after picture of horrid faces starring back at her. It was official, she was cursed.

"Shit."

Bella plopped down on the floor, defeated from the day. She was so distraught she hadn't realized that her left breast was now popping out of the top of her wrap. She was giving homage to the great Nipplegate of '04.

"Miss? Umm, Bella…" Edward was unsure of how to proceed. He'd already seen her naked, but her exposed breast was doing nothing to help the monster in his pants.

Jessica looked up from the reception desk, disturbed by the loud cries emanating from the floor, while Jake dashed to her aid screeching about mascara.

The only thing Edward knew to do was shield Bella with his own body. He hugged her close until her sobbing ceased, then delicately motioned at her wardrobe malfunction.

It was then, and only then that Bella realized her day of degradation was not yet complete. Not only had she flashed the super hot photographer… twice, but Alice had left. With the car. Bella was stranded.

Edward and Jake had managed to get Bella to the back of the studio to change. She was now sitting in her mustard stained clothing dialing Alice's number to no avail. It was going straight to voicemail.

"Fuck my life," Bella stated as Edward walked in with a paper cup full of hot tea. He offered it to his new favorite maiden.

"Everything okay?" Edward questioned Bella, noting the disgusted look on her face.

"No! I don't have a ride home. My friend brought me, but had to leave for an emergency, and I can't get a hold of her."

Without a second thought, Edward reacted. "I can take you home."

Bella's head snapped up meeting Edward's gaze. She had to admit that the prospect of the handsome gentleman taking her home was flattering. Edward had been so kind to Bella that afternoon, despite her emotional outbursts. She cringed at the thought of how she'd yelled at him for walking in on her while dressing.

"Really? I wouldn't want to inconvenience you." Bella wondered whether he felt pity or proclivity.

Edward didn't waste a second before his answer. "No, of course not. It would be my pleasure."

ʘ‿ʘ

After deciding to leave early for the day, Edward walked the seductive Miss Swan to his car. He was gliding on a plane of air, giddy with the prospect of spending more time with Bella.

"Mademoiselle…" Edward opened the passenger door while giving a short bow. He was gallant after all. No one would mistake him for a rube, particularly where Bella was concerned.

Bella sat in the passenger seat, holding tightly to the door handle as they sped toward her apartment. A seatbelt would have made her feel more comfortable, but being an older model car, it was not equipped. She suddenly wished she had her bike helmet in case of a crash.

Edward zipped along the road happily, humming to himself thinking about the circumstance in which he would ask for Bella's phone number. He could just look in her photo file, but that seemed a bit stalker-ish.

_Bella, could I have your number so I could call you sometime?_ Edward chanted the mantra in his head convinced he would ask when he pulled in front of Bella's building.

"Take the next left," Bella directed. Their ride was coming to an end and Edward hadn't said a word to her since they left the underground parking garage of the mall. Bella was sure Edward had been interested in her as more than just a frightful face in front of the camera. But, as he pulled in front of her building, not having uttered a word, her hope slipped away that Edward would want to ever see her again.

"Okay, thanks. Bye." Bella shouted as she vaulted from the car. Edward was left reeling, not given the opportunity to say the words he'd so carefully practiced on the seven minute drive, due to stop lights, of course. He slumped against the seat, carefully held together by duck tape, wholly defeated.

As Edward drove back to his own home, he couldn't expel the thoughts that had plagued him for most of the afternoon. He wondered what had made Bella purge herself from the car as if she was being exorcised. As he trudged up the stairs to his door, he came to the only conclusion that made sense. He was a loser creep who invaded women's privacy.

Readying himself for bed in only his boxer shorts and a white tee, Edward heaved a sigh and climbed under the knitted afghan his mother made that covered his bed. Edward drifted off to sleep to Ani DiFranco's _Grey_, knowing he would never have a need for anything larger than a double size bed.

ʘ‿ʘ

The pounding on the door startled Bella awake. She glanced at her clock, noting it was one in the morning. Her father, a retired policeman taught her to pay attention to such things, particularly when someone was beating on your door in the middle of the night.

She trudged to the door, looking sleepily through the peep hole. All she saw was a mess of brown hair.

"Who is it?" Bella asked through the closed door.

"It's Edward. The photographer?"

Bella wondered why the photographer would be at her home in the middle of the night. Was he a rapist? Did he pick her as his next victim? Did he use his job to prey on unsuspecting women?

Bella did what any young unsuspecting woman would do. She grabbed an umbrella hanging on the coat rack and armed herself with pepper spray her father had given her for Christmas last year.

"What do you want?" Bella asked, trying not to show the fear in her voice.

"I just want to see you Bella." The small brunette opened the door, ready to spring upon her attacker if need be.

"Bella, my beauty, I hardly think all these weapons of minor destruction are necessary. I am only here to kiss you."

"Kiss me?" Bella thought the interaction had taken a rather strange turn, but didn't feel in a position to argue.

"Okay."

While Edward leaned in and took Bella's lips unto his own, she dropped the umbrella and pepper spray unceremoniously onto the entryway floor.

"Take me to bed." Bella couldn't believe her own ears at the sound of her words interrupting their molten kiss.

She imagined that a man as handsome as Edward would have many lovers and be very skilled in all areas pertaining to the bedroom. She was giddy with excitement. Edward placed Bella on the edge of the bed where she found her hands free to roam the Romanesque man in front of her. As she discarded his shirt, she wasn't disappointed. Edward didn't have defined muscles or noticeable pectorals. His body was that of an average man; average in every way. And this was to Bella's delight. She didn't want to be with a man where she would need to compete with the gym or prepare wholesome meals. She wanted a man who would ravish her with kisses and leave her vagina intact when he was finished, not aching for an ice pack.

"You are so perfect Bella. Your hair seems shorter than this afternoon. A little less…plump perhaps." Bella just grinned and jumped on her photographer in shining armor.

Bella had always wanted to give a man oral pleasure and Edward definitely fell into that category. But Bella took it head on like a pro. She licked and sucked, bobbed and weaved. The sounds coming from Edward told her she was putting on an excellent program.

Just when she though he would come in her mouth, Edward picked Bella up roughly and tossed her onto the bed. She had fantasized about rough sex after seeing an episode of _Emmanuel In Space_ on Cinemax. Edward ripped his remaining clothes from his body, and then set a course to do the same for Bella.

Once both Edward and Bella were naked, hands began to roam freely and tongues licked leisurely. Edward slipped inside Bella and she groaned from his penetration. He was definitely skilled, and Bella knew this would all come to an end way too soon for her liking. Her hand trailed down her body until it reached the wetness where Edward was residing. Bella touched herself, caught up in the immense pleasure. She could feel her stomach tighten and her muscles clench.

Then she heard a sound; a buzzing sound.

Bella's eyes shot open to reveal the early morning light of Sunday. It was all a dream. Bella was still alone and Edward was still a photographer that wasn't interested. She sighed deeply and rose from her bed, headed for the shower.


End file.
